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This is the blog of Steve Burkett of Italy, Our Italy

Covering for Friends

I'm happy that friends have asked me to cover for them. I did. And it was fun!

“I’d be glad to cover for you too, should you need it”

I'm talking about book and CD covers, by the way. My friend an author, Diana Armstrong asked me to do the cover art for her new book, "A Winding Path to Umbria: The Silent Bridge of Time". As well, my nephew, Ben Johnson, asked be to do the art for his CD titled "Handcrafted Peace" an album of piano music that he composed. Here's the story of each.

A Winding Path to Umbria

Diana G Armstrong is a gifted friend and author who lives in both Denver and Italy. She and her husband David have a beautifully charming home in Lubriano, Italy. Much of that charm comes from the fact that their abode is part of a converted, 400-year-old monastery. In her first book, "Somewhere South of Tuscany: 5 Yeas in a Four-Cat Town" (2010), Diana tells the story of how they came upon, purchased, and renovated their home is a sleepy, four-cat town.

Diana's second book is a bit of a departure, in that it is a story of historical fiction; the historical part having a very close tie to her past and her Lubriano home -- both of which she learned were intertwined.

Here is a photo that I took from Diana's window, where she often sits to write.

That little village, isolated atop a table of rock, is Civita. Note the pedestrian bridge leading to Civita...this bridge plays an important part in the story that she writes.

Diana had admired her view for years before she found out the significance to her family. Recently, she uncovered the fact that her South African father, 70 years earlier, was here, too. He fought with the allies in this Calanchi Valley against the mighty German war machine. How could an author not write about such a connected event!

When Diana first asked me to do the cover art for her book, my thoughts went to the intrigues of battle and dark nights, where allies crept up on Germans ensconced in this hill top fortress. So, I began my book cover imaginings there...with a paperback cover of the traditional size.

I cropped the photo that I taken from Diana's window into a format that I imagined for a paperback novel. Here is my first imagining.

As I was imagining a night-time scene, here is where my imaginings took me.

Operating in the dead of night could be risky in the days before night vision goggles, so we needed a moon to give our troops a bit of maneuvering light.

I can just see them sneaking through the trees, ready to scale those cliffs, can't you?

I created a bit of moonlight reflecting off of the rooftops.

All we need now is some text for the book title and author's name.

Ahhh, not to be.

When I woke up from my imaginings and actually met with Diana to discuss the book and its book cover, it turns out that the bridge leading to Civita is a central figure in the story...an artifact that just had to have prominence on the cover. So, it was time for me to change my imaginings and it was back to the drawing board. We needed a completely different view of Civita.

Here is a photo that we settled on that would give the town prominence, while also showing the Calanchi Valley through which the allies operated, and all the while, showing the bridge to Civita front-and-center.

We worked through several iterations of color, artistic effect and cropping..."should we show this much of the bridge? or this much? or how about this much?"

I began to use my 'digital brushes' to create various artistic, painted effects.

With about two-dozen images to chose from, here is the final result that satisfied both Diana and her publisher.

And here is that photo, sitting right, smack, dab on the cover of Diana's new book.

If you click on the cover of her book, you will be taken to the Amazon website, where you can order either a paperback version, or a Kindle version. Go ahead...give it a try.

Understand that all proceeds for this book and Diana's previous book go to underprivileged African children. Funds go to both her daughter's mission that now works with Living Hope Charities in East London, S.Africa, and also to a Hospice for Children (mostly born with Aids) in Durban South Africa. Diana says that money from the US makes a huge difference in Africa.

And here is the link to Diana's previous book about her lovely, little community, "Somewhere South of Tuscany: Five Years in a Four-Cat Town".

Oh, one more thing...do you like to eat? or cook? Then you will just love Diana's first book -- its a cookbook. It is called "Cooking for My Friends". I know that she knows what she is writing about, because we have been fortunate to be friends for whom she has cooked.

Handcrafted Peace

On a gentle, musical note, my nephew Ben Johnson, is a very talented piano player and composer. Ben's aim is to create music that is just plain peaceful. Saint Benjamin (his new moniker -- not a saint of the dead variety, but a saintly work in progress) wanted to create something that you can listen to that will a release you of all of the negative thoughts of the day. He succeeded.

When Ben contacted me, he had spent time looking at photos on my alternate website, Steve Burkett Photography. He felt that certain photos in the Winter Solace gallery met his vision of 'peaceful'.

Here is the original photo that he asked me to work into the cover art for his CD.

I took this photo in the spring of 2013 in eastern Colorado as I returned from a trip to Virginia.

After just a bit of work to add contrast to the image, I arrived at this next iteration.

Obviously, a CD cover-insert needs to be in a square format. And, as Ben wanted something in the black & white vein, we settled on this photo for his 'Handcrafted Peace' CD.

If you click on the CD cover photo, you will be taken to Ben's website, where you can listen to his peaceful music, and even purchase a copy if you wish.

Ben's latest project is creating music that conjures up visions of the emojis you've seen in your texts. Want to hear what an emoji sounds like? Go here to hear his drafts, including this emoji for a slice of pizza. Who would have thought?

So, that's how I've spent a bit of my time -- covering for my very talented friends. I'd be glad to cover for you too, should you need it.

Ciao for now,

Steve

Please, Thank You & Where's the Bathroom

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Don't let your fear of the Italian language keep you from going to Italy! You will be able to converse. You will be able to eat and drink. You will be able to get around.

Today let's talk about the language barrier that might be keeping you from visiting Italy. When it comes to traveling to Italy, this should not worry you one bit. Really...don't worry about it.

“They can usually peg you as American pretty quick and give you an appropriate menu”

I have heard a lot over the years about how we in the USA don't speak several languages like the nice folks in Europe. But, I say...we don't typically need to, and they do. Within a 700-mile radius of the geographical center of the United States (located just outside of Lebanon, Kansas), you will be well contained within the borders of our large country. Make a circle of a 700-mile radius from Vienna, Austria, and you will encompass around 35 countries, virtually every country in Europe (except far-flung Norway and Finland), along with their varied languages. Well, that's my excuse anyway, and I'm sticking to it.

So, don't feel guilty about not knowing Italian...just get there, anyway. There are several reasons that I say this, all based on our experiences.

They Speak English

First, in the 6 trips we have made to Italy, we have run into only 2 people who did not speak English! One was in a little gift shop in Varenna on the shores of Lake Como, and one was in a wood-carver's shop in Venice in the dead of winter (i.e. it wasn't the 'tourist season'). If you don't stray too far from the beaten path, you will have no problem with communication.

I've asked many Italians why they speak English so well, and most give me two reasons. One is that it is the language of the tourist -- its a matter of doing business with those traveling within Italy. The second is that they love our movies and television shows, which are often projected and broadcast in English. Witness the posters to the right plastered in Capri. Italians are big on celebrity...think about the origin of the word 'paparazzi'!

After listening to an Italian-language CD for several months and studying up on vocabulary, on our second trip I tried to get checked into our hotel using my well-rehearsed Italian. The desk clerk's first words after I went through my routine were, "You want to try that in English?". 'Nough said.

Dual Signage

Nearly everywhere you go, you will see signs in two languages -- Italian and English. Here are some examples.

Waiting to catch your train...

...notice that each of the salient words in Italian are echoed in English?

Here is a sign in Florence for the Accademia gallery where the David statue is housed.

Whatever it says in Italian, it also says in English.

Need to take a vaporetto (water bus) in Venice?

Dual language, once more.

Ordering from a printed menu...

...often has an English translation with the Italian, like this menu from La Taverna at the Banfi winery. They probably have menus like this in at least French and German, also.

Often the menu is just in English. They can usually peg you as American pretty quick and give you an appropriate menu, like this one from La Pergola in Rome (make your reservation at least four months before your departure -- and be sure you have a sufficient balance on your credit card).

[Just a note about the menu shown above: this is the man's menu...the woman's menu has no prices...don't you just love those Italians?!]

Here is a menu board at a small restaurant on Campo di Fiori in Rome.

I don't think you would have any problem at all ordering breakfast, do you?

Nor, would have much problem with liquid refreshment, either. Just ask for 'vino rosso' or 'vino bianco', or say 'coco-cola light, per favore'. And speaking of wines, we have found the house wines, often served by the pitcher, to be delizioso. Ask for, 'Vino rosso della casa' for instance, if you would like red house wine. You probably figured that out on your own, didn't you?

Bottled water is everywhere. You just need to decide on 'senza gas' (no carbonation) or 'con gas', with carbonation. Your waiter will ask, and you will usually just need to say the words, "Yes", or "No". It's pretty simple.

At the Market

There are fresh-produce and seafood markets throughout Italy calling out their freshness. Now, there isn't much need for signage interpretation on most items, as they are obviously sitting right there in front of you for you to see. But you may need a bit of 'translation' on the units...like Euros and kilos.

See those nice Italian pears? Based on my calculations (and today's value of the Euro), I'd say they cost about $1.95 in dollars-per-pound. Multiply the Euro-price-per-kilo by about 0.55 to get the price in U$D-per-pound...maybe round to 0.5 or 0.6 to get a rough estimate.

These squash blossoms are sold by the 'mazzo' or bunch/bouquet and would cost you about $1.11 at today's conversion rate, which is a fabulous rate...excuse me whilst I go online to make a plane reservation!

OK, I'm back.

Sometimes you do actually need to know a bit of translation. Want some of this salami?

Grab a bottle of wine and a link of this salami for your picnic this afternoon. But, I didn't know that you like donkey! What you don't know probably won't hurt you.

Driving

Here is where you need to learn a bit of signage...but it is mostly graphic in nature these days. Your rental-car agreement will probably have a brochure included, as does almost all guidebooks. Be sure to know what the no parking sign looks like if you want to avoid hefty parking fines...and they will catch up to you here in the good ole USA, won't they, Scott?!

How about directional signs, like these?

Do I need to translate the arrow symbol for you? I thought not. And the mileage in most of Europe is in kilometers. To convert to miles, multiply the distance in kilometers by 0.62...just round to 0.6 and you will be OK. Siena is roughly 12 miles, isn't it? Close enough.

Common Sense

Often, you have no problem translating words from Italian because you can use your common sense. Take the photo to the right, for instance. Can you guess to what this ticket would give you admission?

Some of the words or phrases that are used in Italy actually come from the USA. We were in a glass shop on the Piazza San Marco purchasing some nice glassware. The radio was playing. The announcer was speaking lots of Italian that we could not understand, and then all-of-a-sudden, we hear worked in, "...Top 40 Weekend..." Some things just don't translate well, evidently.

Friendly People

Italy is absolutely full of friendly people. Really...it's the friendliest place we've ever been. Have a problem finding something? Just ask. Need help ordering? Just ask. Lost? Just ask.

Here are just a few of the friendly people who have helped us over the years (I'll share more in a future blog).

Even the police in Rome will give you a hand when you need it.

Web Research

Obviously, when you go, you will be doing some research on the web. There are scores of sites that focus on Italy...and many of those are Italian sites. But, don't worry -- most have a way to get an English language version -- other than using Google Chrome hit-and-miss translation.

Here are a couple of examples.

Here is the site for museums in Florence. See the row of flags under the words 'Florence Museum'? Click on the British flag (they speak English pretty well there, too) and you get the English-language pages served up to you. Sometimes its the Stars-and-Stripes. This site was very thoughtful in their tourism-directed information to provide information in eight different languages. This is rare.

Though it is rare to find that many language version for a website, many have Italian and English versions, like the two that follow.

This one for La Terrazza del Principe overlooking the Boboli Gardens in Florence...a beautiful setting for beautiful food and beautiful people just like you (park on the sidewalk, by the way)...has the flags of Italy and Britain to guide you.

This website for the vaporetto service in Venice has a drop-down box for you to select from Italian or English.

And on some sites, you see just abbreviations like "It" and "En" on which you can click.

The Universal Languages

And then there are two other, more universal languages with which you are already familiar.

A pat on the back for man's best friend says, 'Good doggie!'...

...and the universal language of music needs no translation...and you will find it on almost any piazza or campo in the evening.

Sometimes, Just Give Up

As I say, sometimes, just give up. Here is one of those instances.

This poster recognizes that an election is approaching. As we can't vote, there isn't much point in being able to read all it says. But, I just wanted to show you this poster because of the political parties...there are twelve represented here, along with their slate of candidates. Thank goodness for the two-party system...I guess.

Having Said All That...

Yes, it is fun to learn something new, and Italian is no exception. Go to almost any guide book and you will find phrases for various situations (e.g. ordering food, taking a taxi, getting emergency help, asking directions [women only, please], etc).

Go to your local bookstore, or order on line, and you can use CDs and books to learn a bit more. I haven't learned all of the conjugation and tenses, but I could use the bit of wording I know, plus some charade-like pantomiming, to get my point across if it came to that. And, I believe it shows a bit of respect for the host country to use their language, if at all possible.

But again, its not essential for all of the reasons I've outlined above. And for sure, don't let your lack of the Italian language keep you from heading to Italy, and then enjoying yourself while there. As they say, 'A life lived in fear, is a life half lived' -- and we want to live life to the fullest -- so pack your bags without apprehension and just do it!

If you need some help, and you happen to see me there, call me over and we can surely get something worked out.

Ciao or now,

Steve

ps: By the way, it's 'per forvore', 'grazie', and 'dove il bagno'.

Go There: Bellagio

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At the end of your slow-boat ride on Lake Como is your destination: Bellagio.

Last week, I explained how one should approach Bellagio. This week, I present the town itself...bella Bellagio...the most romantic town in Europe.

“One of the things that makes Bellagio so unique are its ‘streets’. These are no ordinary streets, as no autos can travel them”

The setting for Bellagio is unique, as it sits at the end of a spit of land which juts out into Lake Como, or Lago di Como. This location actually adds a good bit to its charm, as there is no through traffic to clutter up your visit...one has to either intentionally be driving to Bellagio, or one must be lost. Check out the map in last week's article to see what I mean about its location.

Getting There

To learn more about how to get to Bellagio, see my article from last week, appropriately titled, "Getting There: Bellagio".

Here you can see a passenger 'slow boat' that I so espouse as it arrives at Bellagio.

One of the 'slow boats' that ply the waters of Lago di Como

Ah, the destination has been reached...we are now in Bellagio.

The 'Streets' of Bellagio

One of the things that makes Bellagio so unique are its 'streets'. These are no ordinary streets, as no autos can travel them. There are about a half-dozen of these ally-like streets that go from the lower, lakeside, outbound roadway of Bellagio, to the upper, inbound roadway.

In this photo is the lakeside portion of the auto roadway that leads out of town. The roadway makes a bit of a jog to the left at the Hotel Metropole, our hotel for this stay.

The roadway headed through, and then away, from Bellagio. Our pink hotel in the distance

And here is the upper roadway...yes, that's actually the road coming into Bellagio, and we are driving it in a car that we rented for a day (see more in the article 'Stumbling Upon Something Magnificent').

In between these two portions of auto road are the pedestrian shopping streets, as you can see below. These streets echo the difference in elevation between the lower and upper roadways.

Shopping Bellagio

The Como area was once the silk capital of Europe. Mulberry trees kept the silkworms happily making silk, and the Italians were happily making silk cloth. Though this industry has all but vanished, there are still many items made of silk available in Bellagio.

Here we see some of the silk and its shoppers.

A tradition of days gone by was for young women to wear a bridal headdress made of intricately design hair pins -- I'm sure there is a more appropriate name for them, but that's how I know them. Just below is one of those hair adornments.

Today, these head pieces have been disassembled into its individual parts and they are available for purchase. Here you see Ellen and Debbie as they consider their purchase of serving pieces that have been fashioned from these pieces.

In the market for Italian-made shoes or shirts? You are in luck!

Food!

I always try to include photos of food from any place that we visit...this is important, don't you think? Here are a few selections from a number of restaurants we have visited on our trips to Bellagio.

And there are some beautiful settings for partaking of food. We especially like the lakeside setting of the first photo. And both of the ladies in our group thought that our waiter made the setting more attractive, too.

Hotels

Our hotel on one trip, the Albergo Metropole, sits in a perfect location in town. We had a room with balcony overlooking the lake.

Our lakefront rooms were superb. You can see the ferry dock in the photo with Scott and Debbie, and across the lake to Menaggio in the photo with Ellen and me.

And the view at sunset left nothing to be desired. Here is an evening ferry from Menaggio nearing the Bellagio ferry dock.

Evening view from our room at the Metropole

Here is the link to the Hotel Albergo Metropole.

On a previous trip we stayed at the five-star Grand Hotel Villa Serbelloni. The guest register for this palace of a hotel is chock-a-block full of names of the past that you would recognize -- including yours truly, of course.

Here, you can see the layout of the GHVS, with the main portion of Bellagio being to the right. We swam in the pool -- brrrrr -- and actually found the lake to be a bit warmer!

Have you ever eaten in a more opulent breakfast room?

Lunch or dinner on the terrace is exquisite.

Here is my wife, Ellen, and me after a scrumptious dinner at GHVS. Did I mention that we danced to a small orchestra after dinner?

Here is the link for the Grand Hotel Villa Serbelloni.

Sights of Bellagio

It is interesting to note that, though Bellagio sits at the base of the alps, it is in a sub-tropical climate. You will find several palm trees, like this one, scattered around.

I will leave you with several photos of Bellagio and its environs. Here you will see the view of the lake and beyond from Bellagio, the beautiful flowers, buildings, etc. Enjoy.

And here is an interesting view of a Pringles dispenser! Have you ever seen one of these? But what a great idea for those emergencies when you feel you need something lite and a bit salty.

I will leave you with one final photo that sums it all up for us...

Want to make a trip to Bellagio? Drop me a line and I'll be happy to give you some more tips!

Ciao for now,

Steve

Getting There: Bellagio

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Bellagio is worth getting to...but just how should one go about it?

You've no doubt heard of Bellagio. But we are not speaking of the beautiful Bellagio Hotel of Las Vegas, but the real Bellagio...the one from which the hotel was modeled, complete with lake, though no fountain and light show exist at the real Bellagio.

Just one of the many lakeside towns you will see on your slow-boat journey to Bellagio

“The northern-Italian town of Bellagio has been dubbed ‘the most romantic town in Europe’, and we must agree. What a marvelous setting!”

Lake Como and Bellagio

Bellagio sits on an interesting point in the lake district, about 45 miles north of Milan. What is interesting about Bellagio's location is the spit of land on which it is located on Lago di Como (Lake Como).

As you can see on this map, the lake is said to be shaped like a running person, with Bellagio sitting right in the...how can I say this in a decorous way...well OK, the crotch.

There is no direct train service to Bellagio, so one must travel to Bellagio either by boat or auto. And, as one can get around through most of Italy using trains, with no need for renting an automobile, let's assume are not traveling by automobile.

The quickest way to get to Bellagio is by taking the train from Milan to Varenna, and then by a short ferry-boat ride to Bellagio. But be forewarned -- this is not the best way to get to Bellagio, as I will explain below.

The Slow Boat

The most pleasant and most excellent path to Bellagio is by a slow boat from Como. The route of the slow boat takes you to between 10 to 16 stops on your journey and the ride will take between 2 and 2 1/2 hours to complete (the number of stops and journey time depends on your departure time). Be warned that there is a fast boat, which is shown on the boat schedule in red as 'Speed Service' -- don't take this boat unless you are going to be late for a dinner reservation at the Grand Hotel Villa Serbelloni (or better yet, change your reservation time). The speed service? It's a hydrofoil boat that takes only 45 minutes to complete its journey.

Since there is a boat that is a good bit faster than the slower boat, why extend your journey on this slow boat? Since a picture is worth a thousand words, I will be using just a few words -- and many pictures -- to explain why you should take the slow boat to Bellagio.

Your Journey Begins

Your journey to the town of Como will start in Milan. For us, we had taken the overnight-sleeper train from Rome to Milan, so we continued our journey to Como early in the morning from Milan. We wanted to catch to 10am boat, so we would arrive in Bellagio just in time for lunch.

These photos were taken as we worked our way through the train yard at Milan.

It's about 20 miles from Como to Bellagio, and our journey should take about 2 1/2 hours.

The lake opens up before you as our Lake Como journey begins

When you get on the boat, take the stairs up to the upper deck for the best views.

This is why you are taking the slow boat -- beautiful town after charming town all along the lake

This boat is similar to the one we are on right now

Lago di Como is surrounded by mountains...and the auto road that ends at Bellagio can be seen cutting across the hill on the right

Another lakeside town you would love to visit, but we won't be stopping here

A lot of mountain, with just a hint of civilization

The clock shows that it is almost 11am; as we left at 10am, we are about an hour into our journey

There is still a lot of lake left on our journey

Many of the villas along the way have gazebo-like embellishments...a quiet place to sit and contemplate the depths of the lake - which happens to be 1,340 feet at its deepest point!

I wish we were on this boat together right this very minute, enjoying the scenery

That one tree looks like they got it at Hobby Lobby...how is it so perfectly shaped?!

This photo and the four below it show the most beautiful house on the lake...idyllic...you've seen it in many movies, like: A Month by the Lake; Star Wars: Attack of the Clones; and Casino Royale. The villa is called Villa del Balbianello. It had fallen into disrepair in the early 1900s and was bought and restored by an American. When the latest owner died in 1988, he left it to the National Trust of Italy. It is open to the public (see their website here).

Looks to be a little after noon...just about 25 minutes more and we will be at Bellagio

Ahhh...bella Bellagio -- we are at the Cadenabia stop and Bellagio is just across the lake and it's next!

As we approach Bellagio, we see one of the auto ferries that travels between Bellagio, Menaggio and Varenna

As we near the dock, we can see our hotel dead center...we are on the top floor of the Metropole, second balcony from the left

And here is our journey's end...and we are just in time for lunch

It's time for a journey's end glass of wine with Scott and Debbie...

...and Ellen has one of her favorite snacks, a grissino, or breadstick

I hope that you are convinced that taking the slow boat to Bellagio is the ultimate journey, one at a pace that gives you time to absorb the charming sights of Lake Como. But, of course, you could have opted for the faster conveyance, below.

The Logistics

Here our friend Scott purchases our tickets as soon as we arrived at the boat dock in Como. It is a good idea to get your tickets early, as the boat does fill up quickly.

Below is the boat schedule, as posted at the ticket office. In the orange box, note the dates for this schedule are between the 1st and 28th of October, 2012. The schedules change drastically after the summer tourist season, so be sure you check online for the correct schedule as you plan your trip.

In the green box is the schedule for the direction of the slow boat from Como to Piona, which is the way we want to go. In the blue box is the yucky hydrofoil Speed Service.

You can see the Navigazione Lago di Como boat schedule on their website. At right is the schedule as of today during the summer of 2016 (but be aware that it is only for service through October 2nd).

So, now you know how to get to Bellagio. Next week, I'll tell you more about the town itself. But trust me, it is a place you will enjoy visiting.

For a related article on an adventure starting in Bellagio, see my article of 07/28/2015 titled 'Stumbling Upon Something Magnificent'.

Ciao for now,

Steve

The Results Are In -- Part 11

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Just a short toot of the horn today...really short.

Right now, I have a photograph being exhibited in the Vermont PhotoPlace Gallery in a showing titled, "Imagined Realities". This non-Italy photo will be exhibited through August 6th.

“That’s slough as rhymes with flew, and not slough as rhymes with rough”

This is one of those instances when I think, 'Alright! The judges get it.'. I'm not sure whether you agree, but the selected photo is one of my favorite manipulations -- though the manipulation is subtle...just the placement of the handwritten letter and some shadows. Thus, I'm happy that the judge agreed that it was worthy of being framed and placed on the walls of this gallery.

Here is the original photo from which I worked.

I took this photo in 2011 while visiting in Maine. I suggested to the owner of this property that it was a bayou, he suggested that it was a slough (that's slough as rhymes with flew, and not slough as rhymes with rough...go figure...why not slew?!). The picturesque slough is between Bath and Wiscasett.

I spent a couple of hours here, some of it in a gentle rain. I would have to admit that as late afternoon turned to evening, it got just a little bit spooky.

Basically, what you see is a lily pad photo. And that's what I saw when I took the photo. Later, I saw something else, as I guess that I was in a state of melancholy. My vision was of a lost love letter, floating just below the surface. So, that's what I created.

Whether the letter was thrown away by the recipient, or whether it blew away without the recipient's permission, I can't say. I'll let you be the judge.

Here's my photo, as it is being exhibited in the gallery this month.

Want to see more of a Maine slough? Then click here.

Ciao for now,

Steve

ps: Thank you to those who pointed out that I definitely have a spelling problem that spell-checker can't solve. This was obvious in the email I sent out last Thursday with photos of time I spent in the desert of Nevada (click here if you missed it). I do know the difference between a dessert and a desert (one is yummy and one is hot), but I obviously didn't understand the correct spelling of each. My sister has now pointed out that the trick is the two s's in dessert, which stand for 'sweet stuff'. OK, I've got it now. And for those who didn't catch the spelling error, you can join me as the first to sit down during a spelling bee.